POLLUTION NEWS AND INFORMATION
We are sorry to announce the passing of a great American.
January 21, 2007
Santa Clause Dead At Age 2,029
Press Release: Santa Clause Found Dead In North Pole of Toxic Chemical and Heavy Metal Poisoning. (Courtesy of the Walrus Gazzett)
Apparently, Mrs. Clause found Santa hunched over his work table early this morning. An autopsy, mandated by territory of the North Pole, determined that Mr. Clause had died of an over dose of city pollution. This was strange since Santa only ventured into the cities once per year to deliver toys. It was found however, that Santa being a pure and innocent being (much like a young child) had not built up a resistance to many of the toxins and poisons like older city-dwellers have. Also, he did have a taste for fast food admitted Mrs. Clause. This may have had an impact on his general health and immune system since he weighed over 400 pounds at his demise. The county medical examiner stated there was no way to know if the chemicals killed him first or the French fries and soft drinks. It was a toss up.
The elves and the reindeer were examined and blood and urine sample were taken. Other.......
More at: http://www.rifeenergymedicine.com/Santa.html
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